I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
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