do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
So many bounce houses so little time
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Randomize
