i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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