The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
