So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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