So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
