He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
