So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
