You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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