I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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