Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Randomize
