He disabled his match.com account in front of me
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
