Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Shame is for Republicans.
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