508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize