she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
