So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
30 People Reveal The Moment They Realized: ‘Oh Sh*t, I’m An A**hole’
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
30 Tiny Celebrity Tattoos You’ll Want To Run Out And Copy ASAP
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!