If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
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