Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b