Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
