Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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