At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
You're a waste of cheezeits
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Randomize
