I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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