The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
