dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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