Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
