Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
