he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
