You work out of a Hotel?
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
