Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
