i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
