dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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