Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
My bed smells like the plague
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
