How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
