I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
