weddingsv make me drug and hornr
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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