Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
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