i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
