I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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