Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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