Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
