just tell him i said nine months
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Randomize
