jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
