There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Randomize
