I want to make a zoo with you.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Quick, to the slutcave!
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
