She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
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