No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
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Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
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I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.