Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize