I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
We had sex on a dog bed..
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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