girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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