either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
